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Travis Trades Me Sunset Window for Mirror of Holiday Death

Travis and the MIrror of Holiday Death
Travis and the MIrror of Holiday Death

I put an ad on craigslist recently because I am trying to get rid of all the large items in bARTer Sauce.

I have to ship The Sauce to Sacramento, CA for an art show at Side Show Studios and I'd rather not ship anything that weighs over 100 lbs or measures 5 feet in any direction. It just wouldn't be wise.

Faux Fur Painting

Original Owner: 
Faux Fur Painting
Faux Fur Painting
Faux Fur Painting
Faux Fur Painting
Faux Fur Painting

Rebecca's Story that came with the Faux Fur Painting:

I used to paint on fake fur back in the 80s when I lived in NYC. I had an art installation at a bar called "Downtown Beirut"( on the Lower East Side). I covered all the walls with paintings of famous architecture on shag fake fur. I covered the ceiling ( with Putti like an Italian church on lime green plush) bar stools,and I did art for the bathrooms ( which got slashed with a knife). The owners loved it so much they wanted it up for two months.

Fire Breathing Nun Painting

Original Owner: 
Fire Breathing Nun Painting
Fire Breathing Nun Painting

I made this trade with Victoria and Tim while they were in the midst of moving.

They're super busy. Or at least I think they are. I know I would be if I was moving. So in short, I don't blame them for not sending me a the six stories they owe me right away.

Big Painting

Original Owner: 
Painting of orchard in Wenatchee
Painting of orchard in Wenatchee

Beryl's Story About "Big Painting:

The story behind the painting is this: It's of an orchard in Wenatchee. and I don't know how to reduce what I've got. When my mom first moved there as a step mom to my two bros she had no experience with "country." She was out picking asparagus and a bull snake slunk out and wrapped itself around middle bros leg.

She freaked out.

Beryl Trades Me Big Painting for Appalachian Dolls

Pink, glittery landscape painting
Appalachian Dolls - After

Beryl took pity on the Appalachian dolls and did some surgery to separate them from each other

"I thought you might like to see I've resurrected the kids. New: hairdos, faces, buttons for hands, tie and buttons on shoes for girl, button and belt for boy. Interestingly enough, when I turned around the shirts I found a sticker that they had been made in China. It would be interesting to know, "green-wise," the size of their footprints. I'll give them to Community Services for the Blind."

Woman Feeding Horse

Original Owner: 
Rosalie Hates K...
Woman Feeding Horse

Rhiannon's Story about Woman Feeding Horse:

I bought this at an art show in college for fifty dollars. It priced at $450.00. The artist was dating a friend of mine, so he sold to me for very cheap... probably less than the cost of the materials it took to create. The painting is mounted and ready to hang. It is of a chick with her boobies hanging out, I think she's knocked up. There is a church in the background.

Old Man Murder (Plug It In)

Original Owner: 
Plug It In/Old Man Murder

Sean's story submitted with Old Man Murder (a.k.a. Plug It In):

Here we go for a third offer [Note from Rosalie: Sean has submitted this painting as a trade offer for two other items, where, as much as I wanted to, I just couldn't trade him -- this time, he's in luck.] Who knows, maybe it'll stick this time. I swear that Rosalie just likes to taunt me...

Below is the same recycled story...

Pig Face

Original Owner: 
Pig Face

Tim's Story that came with PigFace:

Thanks for the trade. I love scary drunk clowns. I found the pig in the trash area of my building about a week after I moved in (The Prudential Building in Pioneer Square). I didn't really know anyone in the building then and most likely it was put there by someone moving out so I never figured out where it came from. The building was mostly artists when I moved in 5 years ago but now there are only a couple. I didn't unroll it till I got it upstairs. I loved it and hung it high on my wall (I have a 22 foot ceiling in my loft) so it overlooked the entire space. My girlfriend hated it but when I told her I traded it she said she had gotten use to it.

Some additional annoying questions I made Tim answer:

Q. What was your first kiss like? How old were you? How'd you make your move?
A. I really don't remember

Q. Did you find the pig face and what made you say....I want that in my house?
A. I wanted it because it was unique and someone put a lot of time, effort and paint into it. They must have had a great vision but when it didn't come out the way they wanted they threw it into the trash.

Q. Did you name the pig face?
A. No

Q. If you didn't name the pig face, but if someone was making you name it now, what would you name it?
A. It's kind of an evil looking pig so something like Scarebelch The Rancid (compliments of Seventh Sanctum Evil Name Generator)

Q. Have you ever gone ice skating?
A. Not that I remember.

Q. What was the last thing you sent through the mail that wasn't a bill or something boring?
A. I send about 100 packages through the mail every day. I sell mostly books, toys & games, vintage kitchen and vintage clothing

The last thing I sent that wasn't a purchase was a digital camera someone left up at our cabin - I mailed it back to them.

Q. Do you remember kindergarten at all?
A. The only thing I remember about kindergarten is walking to school . I went to BF day in Fremont and had to walk over the scary concrete bridge that goes over Aurora Ave.

Q. How long have you lived in Seattle?
A. Most of my life

Q. Where else have you lived and why did you leave there?
A. My parents bought a motel in Ocean Shores on the Washington Coast and we lived there for 2 years during 7th and 8th grade then came back to Seattle.

(note from Rosalie - hey - my parents owned a Motel too. The Twin Birch in Brainerd, MN. See, now we never would have learned how much we have in common if I didn't get to make you answer all my annoying questions!)

Worried Man Painting and a Bazillion Vintage Cigarette Coupons for Arndt Boe's tombstone

Two Crazy Ladies Trading Things
Woman Holding Tombstone On Table

Okay, so Board President of Bad Fruit Foundation, Roberta Minor, will be getting the tombstone. And not because the home page of their website has a quote from me on it (a fact I realized when searching for the link to post here) but because she found the Worried Man painting in an alley. The painting that spawned at least one fight and one competition between my friend Colin and a museum. Colin lost. But Roberta will win!

Double Vaginas

An Oddly Suggestive Painting

My friend Ben Martin used to do stand up comedy.

He doesn't do it anymore, but he does sometimes hang out in the bar downstairs from our apartment. He heard about the Crow Cannon and saw an opportunity to get rid of a painting he's been hauling around.

Apparently Ben got some hand me down furniture from some friends, a coffee table I think, and when they brought it over, they broke the news to him that if he wanted the coffee table, he would also be taking the painting.

It's huge. Huge.

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