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Kelly trades me a MYSTERY ITEM in exchange for a giant, inflatable cell phone

Two Women Standing Next To a Giant Inflatable Cell Phone

I really can't say enough good things about Kelly Lyles.

She is truely one of the most interesting, friendly people I've ever met. Plus, as an added bonus, she's one of the only actual artists who smells what The Sauce is cookin'. And for that, I couldn't be more grateful.

Mark Trades Me DJ Turntables in Exchange for Theatre Lights

Man Holding Theater Light Pointed At Camera

This Odyssey/Gemini brand dual DJ turntable and mixer thing is awesome!

Ben Trades Me Double Vaginas in Exchange for the Crow Cannon

Man With Crow Cannon Woman With Painting Called Double Vaginas
Man Holding Crow Cannon

Ben was very excited to be getting rid of his painting.

Mark's wife was very excited to have gotten rid of the Crow Cannon.

Barter Sauce has made two people happy.

How many people have you made happy today?
That many? Really? Wow.

We did this trade gangster/drug dealer style.
We pulled up.
Gave Ben the painting.
Took a bunch of pictures on the sidewalk ....oh wait. They probably don't do that.

Regan Trades Me Real Big Theatre Lights for a Painting Called "Big Girl"

Woman Holding Painting Called "Big Girl"

My adorable co-worker, Regan, propositioned me with a trade for the Big Girl painting.

Regan used to run a small theatre company that eventually went bust. She offered me some real life theatre lights that currently live in her basement. I jumped at the chance as I assume there are other fledgling theatre groups out there who might like some big kid lights of their own. And they could get them for a song.

Four Paintings from Sparky in exchange for one Giant Cell Phone

Kimbery and Rosalie trading for a giant cell phone

Kimberly emailed me and asked if I would like to trade an oversized, inflatable cell phone for Sparky's Eye, Tear, Heart and Lips paintings.

I said yes, yes I would. She got it when she was walking by a garage sale one day and a lady yelled, "Hey, do you want something you'll never use?" She did. Now I do. And perhaps someone out there is jealous and would like to own it themselves. If that is you, contact me.

Kali, the Goddess of Destruction painting for Big GIrl and Blue Clown Face

Woman Holding Two Paintings
Woman Holding a Painting of Kali

Heather approached me saying that she acquired two paintings at an art auction because no one was bidding on them.

She felt bad, so she bid on them both. Then she had to figure out how to get rid of them. That's where I come in.

I traded her the painting of Kali, the Godess of Destruction for two paintings that I call: Big Girl and Blue Clown Face respectively. I'm sure you'll be able to tell which is which.

Rhannon Traded me a Tombstone from 1867 for a Velvet Last Supper and one copy of How to Cook Like a Stud

Woman Holding Heavy Tombstone
bARTer Sauce Trade
bARTer Sauce Trade

Rhiannon (sometimes called 'Nannon or Banana if I'm the one talking about her) got the Velvet Last Supper painting and one copy of How to Cook Like a Stud.

I got a tombstone that probably ensures I'll spend my afterlife complaining about a burning sensation.

Ron gives me two copies of "How to Cook Like a Stud" in exchange for three prints by Kelly Lyles

Ron Reid, Manaeger of The Comedy Underground, doin' a bARTer Sauce trade
Ron Reid, Manaeger of The Comedy Underground, doin' a bARTer Sauce trade
Ron Reid, Manaeger of The Comedy Underground, doin' a bARTer Sauce trade

A long time ago, Ron made me an offer for the Creepy Rhinestone Baby that I ended up trading to the Museum of Bad Art instead.

Kelly gives me another Mice Krispies print in exchange for 600 paper cranes

Kelly Lyles

Previously I threatened to give Ron Reid at the Comedy Underground everything I have yet to trade away with bARTer Sauce.

I have yet to pack up all the untradeables for him. I guess I'm just afraid he'll never let me on stage again. (Perhaps a wise choice in any case.) Plus, I'm probably too lazy to go to all that trouble.

Sparky gives me four Body Part paintings in exchange for all Four of Julia's collages

Man Holding Collage Woman Holding Painting
Man Holding Collage Woman Holding Painting
bARTer Sauce Trade

I traded all four of Julia's collages for four paintings of different parts of the body.

I traded with Stephen, who likes to be called Sparky. His brother painted them.

Sparky:

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