Skip to main content

I Found An Alternate Dimension In A Hole In My Sock Painting

Original Owner: 
Alternate Dimension In A Hole In My Sock Painting
Alternate Dimension In A Hole In My Sock Painting

Rachael's Story About "I Found An Alternate Dimension In A Hole In My Sock Painting"

My favorite argyle sock. Missing for ages, now its little nose pokes out from underneath the dryer like a suspicious weasel. I make a dive for it as if, after its first taste of freedom it might try to make a break for it, back to the unknown lint-filled worlds beneath the large appliance. I snatch it and promptly wrangle it onto my foot, "You shall not escape me again!" (I don't know why I'm so stern toward it, it IS my favorite sock...) Adequately socked and shod, I sally forth into my day.

All is well until I go out on my lunch break.

I'm walking across the parking lot to my car and I feel something in my shoe. The little threads across my heel have given way and there is now a small hole in my sock. I can feel the bare skin of my foot sticking to my insoles with every step. The hole grows bigger. I stop to readjust the sock. Leaning against my car, I try to pry my shoe off. No good. It's stuck there like a barnacle. Even though I'm not walking, the hole is still expanding. The funny thing is, I can no longer feel my foot inside my shoe... I look down to see my sneaker falling off to expose my sock. Not my foot. My foot had entirely vanished. Suddenly, the rest of me followed suit and I was squeezed through the hole like so much buttercream from an icing bag and into a creamhorn.

I don't know where I am. It's dark here. And fuzzy. And all I can smell is dryer sheets.


How big is this painting of sorts?

Searching for something to trade.

This would look lovely hanging in the hall way next to the washer and dryer.


Without actually measuring it...

Id' say it's about 8 1/2 by 11 ish.

With all of that said,

I'll take it. Offer in the can. Let's make this magic happen. With a new apartment in my future I'll have more room to hang sauce art. I want to have it, rather, I need to have this. Also, I want to point out, that MY argyle socks have been missing for about three months. Only to find them yesterday, stinky and with holes in the toes. It seems that someone else wore them, tore them, and hid them away for me to not see them. This painting, if I am granted it, will stand in memory of my socks.


i will find you treasure posing as junk and barter it from bums. i will hobnob with hobos and speak the lost language of BLAR that can only be understood after a bottle of night train or three bottles of manichevitz or 2 40s of mickey's. check back tomorrow for my fantastic finds....

This item has been promised to someone.

You can make a trade offer if you'd like...but you've been warned that your attempts to obtain this item are futile.

I know....

acidgreensheep's picture

who painted this...and she is wonderiffic!

This story rocks. So does the

This story rocks. So does the painting.