Eric was kind enough to tolerate a batch of my "interview" questions.
A note from The Sauce -- all of my references to Jo Jo are about my friend Jessica who is a roller derby lady and a burlesque lady and a crafty vunderkind.
It may become apparent that I have no idea what vunderkind means. Or, by some chance, I may have used it correctly. Either way - keep it to yourself.
So, back to Eric's answers to my ridiculous questions:
Q: Why do you think you like big vaginas so much?
A: Because they're way better than small ones.
Note from The Sauce: I should explain that last question. You see, Eric also traded for this painting which I called "Double Vaginas." He hung it up in his office (which is where this new acquisition is going as well.) In any case, the search phrase "double vaginas" has apparently sent many a disappointed odd porn seeker to the bARTer Sauce website.
Q: Did you think Jo Jo was weird when you first met her?
A: I thought she was a normal chick who acted weird. Soon, I learned she's a weird chick who acts normal at times.
Q: What led up to your first kiss with Jo Jo?
A: I used my best move. I got her drunk.
Q: What mindset were you in when you created your shrine to Bruce Springsteen?
A: It was a preemptive strike against Jessica, who'd have have turned the area into a shrine to gay musicals. Nothing personal, gay musicals, but not on my watch. No, ma'am.
Q: If you had to choose between never eating shrimp again or walking around the block you live on completely naked -- which would it be?
A: I'd walk around the block in my birthday suit for a mug of hot chocolate.
Q: Do you like cats?
A: Snakes with fur.
Q: If a man in a dark raincoat walked up to you on the street and offered you a free laptop, but that laptop had Windows Vista on it -- would you still take it?
A: No way, Jose. Vista, like dames, was put on this earth to weaken us, drain our energy, laugh when they see us naked.