Okay, do you want to know how heavy Stone Face is?
Well, example #1 is that we've kept him on our balcony since we got him. He held down some straw mat thing I bought at Bed Bath and Beyond before I burst into flames (I burst into flames at large, horrible stores like Bed Bath and Beyond and Ikea. "Burst into flames" = had panic attack).
Before we got Stone Face to hold down our stupid straw mat thing the wind would blow and then Doug would have to go downstairs to the Zebra Club and ask them if he could crawl through the window in their men's bathroom to retreive our straw mat and various balcony furniture off of the roof. This hasn't happened once since we got Stone Face.
Now Stone Face is gone.
And it's the middle of the windy season.
We are totally screwed.
Example #2 of how heavy Stone Face is....
Just look at the veins in Rhiannon's neck as I make her continue to hold Stone Face up while I take picture after picture. Look how her shoulders slump and her smile turns into a grimmace. I don't know why Rhiannon continues to trade with me. I always make her hold up horribly heavy things. I guess she's just nice.
That is how heavy Stone Face is.
At least I think it is pretty heavy. It looks pretty heavy for sure. I am LUCKY enough to have a horribly painful, bulging disk in my spine so I don't ever get to carry anything remotely as heavy as Stone Face. In fact, Doug makes me give up pretty much anything I'm carrying at any given time. He's nice.
We did this trade at Blaine and Rhiannon's house in Tukwila. We go there every Saturday night to play Bridge. We are all old. But Blaine is the oldest. And Rhiannon is the skinniest. Doug is the most well-versed at making Bridge bidding cheat sheets in Excel. I like potatoes.